NMTLYD - Sad Ending

Never meant to let you down – Sad ending


No day passes that Paul isn't sitting at Chris' side.
Sometimes he brings his bass with him and just plays for hours. Sometimes he sits there and talks about nothing in particular.

But he never receives an answer.

Great sadness and guilt lies upon his heart, like sharp stones stabbing his soul and letting it bleed. He never meant to let him down.

And he regrets. He regrets making the great mistake he made.

He should have stayed at Chris' side. He should have fought for their love.
Instead he acted like a coward. He thinks it's his fault if the man he loves most is lying here.

And it hurts.

He's not been able to sleep since all this happened.
He is taking pills again. Pills to keep him sane, to keep him calm.

The others stopped visiting a while ago. But they call him and talk. Trying to get him to move on.
But Paul simply cannot do that. Chris is everything in his life, and he refuses to let him go.

He promised him to never let him go.

--------

The seasons change.

Paul is on his way to Chris' room. A doctor stops him. "We have to talk" he demands, and the bassist sighs "Mr Gray, we're sorry to tell you that Mr. Fehn's brain function stopped. Right now we keep his body alive but you have to understand that he is practically dead. He's just living as long as the machines are on. We're sorry"

A shock for sure, but no surprise.

"You should say goodbye. There's no use in keeping him alive."

Paul is weak, he can feel himself breaking. He's shaking as he walks to Chris.

He kneels down by the bed and lets the tears flow out fro his eyes while he holds the blonds' hand. "I'm sorry". He nearly collapses as he stands up. Tears upon tears drop onto Chris' face as Paul kisses him one last time
"I love you" he whispers as he shuts the machines down.

It's so weird that nothing changes. The only difference is that annoying beep, replaced by a continuous, flat sound.